Sick Leave
by GrimlyFiendish
Summary: Nightmare Enterprises relies on the valued work of Customer Service, maybe too much...


So, if you're taking the time to read this, I thank you :D

If you could please review it too, I'd really appreciate it :)

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><p>Nightmare Enterprises, under the control of the villain Nightmare, created the best monsters in the universe. Nightmare sold the monsters to evil-doers throughout the galaxies as a front for his evil plans of ruling all.<p>

Customer Service worked almost 24/7, serving the customers of Nightmare Enterprises, supplying them with the best monsters to suit their evil needs, for the biggest ripoff you've ever seen.

There was that time when Customer Service caught that cold that had infected the whole of Cappy Town. (Customer Service had convinced that moron, King Dedede, to buy himself a cold, just to prove that he had a brain. He was _that_ good at his job.) He had continued to work, despite being ill, but when he showed up looking ready to be sent to one of their clients, Nightmare had sent him back to bed. Being as close as they were to conquering the universe, they couldn't lose the support of their 'customers' for doubting the professionalism of Nightmare Enterprises.

The only problem with that, of course, is that there wasn't anybody else to do Customer Service's job. There weren't many other employees full stop. Ever since the incident that involved Knuckle Joe pretending to work for Nightmare Enterprises so that he could get to Masher, one of their best monsters, it's safe to say that Nightmare's trust in his employees dropped.

Customer Service's job couldn't be too hard, if that guy could do it then it should be no problem for the future ruler of the universe. With this thought running through his head, Nightmare sat in the chair in front of the monitor and answered his first call of the day.

( '.' )

King Dedede and his slimey servant, Escargoon, made their way to the throne room to complain about the latest monster that they'd received from Nightmare Enterprises. As usual, the monster was supposed to get rid of that annoying, little, pink ball, Kirby. As usual, the monster was a dud. Yet again, the castle was a wreck, the monster was gone and Kirby was still waddling around somewhere.

Escargoon took his place, standing next to the king's throne, while the king sat in it. Dedede tapped the buttons on the armrest that brought out all of the equipment in the walls, floor and ceiling that allowed for the request and delivery of monsters from Nightmare Enterprises.

When the screen that comes out of the wall, usually to show Customer Service, flickered to life, they were both surprised by what they saw.

The figure on the screen was most definitely _not _Customer Service. The only similar feature was the sunglasses, although Customer Service's shades weren't known to show stars disappearing into the darkness of the lenses. The figure displayed on the screenhad a long, grey face with a pointed nose and large, pointed teeth. It had some sort of fancy headgear on, encrusted with jewels and had two long, thin, golden horns protruding from the sides. It wore two large, armored shoulder pieces on each shoulder, a golden necklace and a long, dark blue cape that it had wrapped around itself. King Dedede and Escargoon noticed none of this.

What they did notice was...

_"You asked me for a monster, so I gave you one! It's not my problem if you have cat allergies!"_

Dedede and Escargoon looked to each other in confusion.

_"Wait, what? You're not Daroach."_

'New guy's already got customer problems,' thought Escargoon. Looking to Dedede, he thought, sniggering, 'his day's not even started yet.'

Dedede got over his confusion by stating the obvious. "You're not Customer Service."

"Yeah," Escargoon backed up his king, "where's the other guy?"

_"Customer Service is unwell at the moment, I am filling his place today."_

"I'll tell you then, I want my money back from all those dodgy monsters you all been sendin' me." Dedede started.

The figure on the screen rolled its eyes, you just couldn't tell.

"Yeah," continued Escargoon, "that last sea monster one sent here didn't even give Kirby a chance to suck it up. Chef Kawasaki fished it out of the water and served it as special of the day."

_"Guess what, I don't care if you don't like seafood. I've got more customers to deal with and much more important things to do. Try again when you've got some IQ." _With that the screen turned itself off, leaving the room in relative silence.

Then Dedede turned to Escargoon.

He said, "Where'd he go? I want him to get me some of that 'IQ'."

Causing the subsequent facepalm of Escargoon.

Customer Service needed a pay rise.

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><p><em>GrimlyFiendish<em>


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